Not, we'll concede, all three simultaneously. As the ancient adage states, though, two out of three isn't bad. As such, heed the peculiar tale of Mii Aihara, a 'military idol' from the Land of the Rising Wang. Her raunchy resume appears to consist of such vital life skills as firing high-powered ballistic weaponry in an array of panty shot-amundo outfits for the delectation of the ogling gentlemen of the world. It's as righteous a cause as any, as the gonads of gun-nuts everywhere will surely attest.
Details of Miss Aihara's scantily-clad shenanigans await in the gallery. As do the ghastly consequences of attempting a real-life Mario Kart race. (Spoiler: It's something akin to, "Hey, ma! Why is my leg pointing that way now? Damn, that smarts! Where are the band-aids?")
To complete the copious crop of crazy, one man -who has clearly put rather too much thought into such things- endeavors to convince us that Pac-Man is a living embodiment of the bastardry of our consumerist culture. And not, say, merely a craptacular archaic slice of retro terrible from the devil's bollocks.
Hit Kotaku for more on Mii Aihara and the perilous Mario Kart race.
IGN's 'Reading Too Much Into Video Games' can be perused here.
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